A brothel manager in Europe has shared insights into the common mistakes that lead men to be discovered visiting adult venues. Catherine DeNoire, who has managed one of the largest brothels on the continent for nearly a decade, noted that many clients make “stupid” choices that put their relationships at risk.
During an interview with news.com.au, DeNoire detailed how easily men can find themselves in confrontational situations with their partners after a visit. She highlighted that leaving phone location services activated or withdrawing large sums of money from a joint account at the brothel’s ATM are among the most frequent missteps.
According to DeNoire, “bonus points” are added if a man directly transfers funds from his joint account to the personal account of the sex worker. She remarked, “It sounds like a no-brainer, but lots of men stop thinking clearly once they enter a brothel. Common sense just disappears.”
DeNoire further elaborated on the more cautious clients who take steps to cover their tracks. These individuals often visit during their lunch breaks, leave their phones at work to avoid suspicious tracking, and bring cash instead of using bank cards. “They take a shower after the session to eliminate any scent or trace,” she explained.
Confrontations Inside the Brothel
DeNoire described various confrontational scenarios that have unfolded within the establishment. Often, a partner arrives asserting knowledge of their significant other’s presence inside the brothel, which leads to heated arguments outside. In one instance, a woman demanded to see the CCTV footage after discovering a ticket from the brothel in her fiancé’s pocket just a week before their wedding.
“She asked me to show her all the security footage from the day in question to confirm whether he had visited or not,” DeNoire recalled. “That’s simply something I can’t do. I can’t just let random people into the office and show them our CCTV footage.” Despite her explanations, the fiancée interpreted the refusal as an attempt to shield her husband, ultimately leading to the cancellation of the wedding.
DeNoire observed that women typically experience a mix of anger, sadness, and betrayal upon discovering their partner’s visit to a brothel, particularly in monogamous relationships. “He’s shocked and immediately starts apologising, claiming he didn’t do anything,” she noted.
Interestingly, she recounted a case where a man confronted by his partner managed to turn the tables, accusing her of “stalking” him. This bold response caught DeNoire off guard, highlighting the diverse reactions that can arise in such situations.
Understanding the Motivations Behind Visits
The reasons men visit brothels, despite being in what they describe as happy, monogamous relationships, vary significantly. DeNoire explained that some clients appreciate their partners but feel that intimacy has diminished over time. Rather than pressuring their partners into activities they may not enjoy, they opt for the professional services offered by brothels.
Other men seek to explore fantasies, such as BDSM, that they feel uncomfortable discussing with their partners. DeNoire noted that some clients view visits as a form of therapy, seeking to vent about personal issues.
“There are also men for whom this is simply part of their lifestyle,” she said. “Even if everything is ‘okay’ at home, they still want to feel like champions — like they’re wanted and desired.”
When asked whether such visits constitute cheating, DeNoire refrained from making blanket judgments. “I don’t know what goes on behind closed doors in their relationship,” she stated. “I don’t want to automatically assume that every man with a wedding ring is cheating, as some couples do have open relationships and are perfectly happy that way.”
DeNoire’s insights shed light on the complexities of modern relationships and the choices individuals make, often leading to unexpected consequences. Her experiences reflect the intricate dynamics of intimacy, trust, and the pursuit of personal desires in contemporary society.